Dear ones,
it is summer and I’m hungover. Spring has had me in a cocoon of curiosity, joy and sacred connection and then it turned summer and instead of emerging a butterfly, I have landed in yet another cocoon, one that is swirling with both stillness and restlessness and I’m still hungry for something and waiting for the time when I get to dry off my sticky wings and fly. Like any hangover on a hot day, it feels harsh and painful and your head is sticky with blurred memories and you wish you were already through it, but you know with certainty it can’t be rushed or forced. I’m feeling Audre Lorde when she wrote “the peaches are flinty and juiceless and cry sour worms”.
A summer of deepening the relationship with myself and others is upon me and yet, it is summer and nothing can be rushed.
Morgan Harper Nichols comes to mind:
Let July be July,
and let August be August.
And let yourself
just be
even in
the uncertainty.
You don’t have to fix everything.
You don’t have to solve everything.
And you can still find peace
and grow
in the wild
of changing things.
And so that is what I’m trying to do. To grow in the wild of changing things. With patience and trust. Patience, which is hard for me. Trust, which is me.
A summer for honesty and letting the sun shine on the parts of me that long to be uncovered, that long to be healed. No attachments to any outcomes. Not predicting trajectories. Just following a flow, because that is how I got here.
In between the hard and the raw and the melancholy, the joyful, the sensual.
🌸 On Friday I wrote a poem about a dead bird, just to watch a hawk soar over me at nighttime, letting me know, there is still flight.
🌸 On Saturday morning I swam naked in the rain and found myself under a beautiful rainbow.
🌸 On Sunday I sat, for the first time, in the sauna my husband built and let the sweat do its healing
🌸 Today? I wonder what small moment of beauty will be arriving for me today.
What are the petals strewn on our path today? And maybe you will see them through a veil of tears, or through rage, or through despair, but my encouragement is to notice them no matter where you are at on your path.
A sweet prayer was extended to me the other day and I would like to offer it up to you as well. A prayer to tend to yourself this summer, to fall deeply in love with yourself, to grow the blooms in your very own soul garden.
If you feel any resistance to this invocation coming up for you, know that it did for me as well. I believe, where we feel the resistance is where we need to push deeper. It is where the magic is.
I want to invite you to join me for a beautiful rose/flower ritual in July’s circle medicine.
A morning of breath, meditation and re-orientation towards the self. Time to be with you. To tend to your flowers.
If you are a paid subscriber you can find the zoom link beyond the paywall. If you would like to attend circle medicine every month, please consider supporting my work through a subscription. If you feel called to just attend this months flower ceremony feel free to send me a message.
For this months circle I encourage you to bring a cup of ceremonial cacao, rose tea, or flower infusion, as well as a rose/flower of choice.
See if you can find a moment of stillness and a peaceful setting to get the full benefit of the beautiful morning I have planned for us.
As always,
the journey is the point,
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